Don’t worry about reading their thoughts

By Jerry Kessel

Looking for a good read to welcome spring? Turn to something novel that is not a book. Novelty T-shirts and bumper stickers. My favorite is first then the rest.

  • I’ll always be there when I need you.
  • I’m not completely useless. I can be used as a bad example.
  • The best thing about the good old days was that I wasn’t good and I wasn’t old.
  • I’m going to stop asking “How dumb can you get”? People seem to be taking it as a challenge.
  • If I’m ever on life-support, unplug me then plug me back in. See if that works.
  • English is weird. It can be understood through tough, thorough, thought though.
  • Not to get technical … but according to chemistry alcohol is a solution.
  • Does anyone else get road rage pushing a shopping cart through the store?
  • Be careful when you blindly follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent!!
  • I am temporarily out of order. Please try again later.
  • Chicken pot pie — my three favorite things.
  • Some folks are wise, and some are otherwise.
  • Duct tape is the force that has a light side, a dark side and holds the universe together.
  • Most computer issues are caused by a faulty connection, between the chair and the keyboard.
  • If you can’t laugh at your mistakes, you messed up for nothing.
  • The labor movement. The folks who brought you the weekend.
  • If you don’t have a seat at the table, you’re probably on the menu.
  • If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?
  • So, if we lie to the government it’s a felony … if they lie to us it’s politics
  • LISTEN & SILENT have the same letters. COINCIDENCE?
  • I did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.
  • Feminism is the radical notion that women are people.
  • You are entitled to your own opinions — but not your own facts.
  • In my defense I was left unsupervised.
  • Critical thinking: the Other National Deficit.
  • Want to see God? Keep texting while you drive.
  • EARTH without ART is just “EH.”
  • Speak you mind — even if your voice shakes!
  • Get involved … The world is run by those who show up.
  • When the power of love overcomes the love of power.
  • We must be the change we wish to see in the world.
  • The highest form of ignorance is when you regret that which you know nothing about.
  • If you’re not outraged … you’re not paying attention.
  • Immigrants Not Ignorance. We are a nation of immigrants, not ignorance.
  • Don’t believe everything you think.

JERRY KESSEL is a member of The Dominion Post’s Community Advisory Board.

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